Got No Patience For Unnecessary People
This one might sound a bit weird, posh, or even snobbish. Some might call me arrogant, yet some will identify and see themselves in the points I’m about to make. If you’re easily offended, or if you’re the eternally optimistic good guy who’s trying to justify everyone’s behavior and see the bright side of everything, then you’ll probably be pissed, so you might want to stop reading. I’m picky and I like it (as Joey would alternatively say). So this one is about us, well, the few of us, that feel like there’s neither patience nor space left for stupid — or to avoid misinterpretations — let’s better call them unnecessary people, in our lives.
Now let’s think a bit. We meet and interact with people daily. For the purposes of this story, let’s target the “neutral” people of our life — not referring to close and personal friends or family.
How many of those do you really like? How many of those you’re vibing with and sharing the same energy? How many of those do actually have something to contribute to your conversations? How many of those are for real interested in you?! How many of those do you find stupid? And how many of those do you simply talk to only because you have to, even though they extremely tire you out and you could easily do without?
If you’ve answered positively to those questions, then I’m happy for you, a good bunch of beautiful people surrounds you, or you’re an optimist, or your patience levels are still running high.
Growing up makes us picky
This is also how I got inspired to write this piece; lately, I tend to find people booooring and uninteresting. I find people to be tiring. I even find some quite slow. And I catch myself with no patience at all left for them. Generally, I’m at that point in life that I easily get annoyed or dislike people for no particular reason. Not everyone obviously, I’m a good person too. I tend to judge and dislike instantly the ones who pretend to be stupid while trying to get what they need from you. The ones who approach you with a motive in mind. The ones who boast about being the people they’re not. And of course, the ones who are accidentally or by nature stupid — that’s alright too. I’m usually better and more accepting of the latter. I sound judgemental, don’t I? It’s cause I probably am, don’t ask me why. Trying to keep my eyes open. At least I admit it.
A natural vs an adapted mindset
Think again of the people you’re interacting with; have you noticed that sometimes you’ve got a different kind of personality when talking to people that you really like?! Well, I have. I’m a better person and definitely more patient with people I find even a slight interest in; the opposite, though, happens when I meet people that get on my nerves (could be for various reasons, we’re all different- not gonna try to explain further). They say you “get what you give”; but if we reverse this saying, for sure you gotta get at least something positive (just a spark, a vibe, a good impression even) in advance so that you can give something back, isn't it? It’s not easy to open up to new people if there’s not even a sign that you’d get along with them! So here it is; an adjusting personality with a tad of patience even in the worst cases, is probably the key to acting less snobbish.
Trained first instinct
I’ve reached the level in which I’m now able to recognize who I’d get on with and who would simply annoy me. It’s probably a bad thing to say, but the first impression I usually get about someone tends to be 90% correct. If I like you, yes, you might get a chance to try out my patience levels. If not, I gotta put a label on you and treat you differently. And this label, to be honest, doesn’t really change that easily. I highly trust my first instinct, so now you fit a category I’ve probably dealt with in the past. Unless you’re that unique person that will unexpectedly surprise me positively. The first impression counts. And I suppose that here’s where my other personality and mood shows up. I’ll interact with you only if I have to, need to, or asked to (badumtssss, one gotta be professional too).
But really, this weird attitude is now coming out naturally. I didn’t use to be that person. I know it isn’t nice, again I recognize it. I don’t easily give people a second chance, and I’m convinced I know myself that well which allows me to know in advance whether I got patience with somebody or not. I might misjudge people, of course; this is why I said that I’m right in only 90% of the cases (I trust my instinct as said above). Out of experience, I’m leaving that 10% blurred out; yeah, it might happen that I change my mind.
Blocking out the unnecessary
Now what I’m trying to understand, though, is whether this attitude has become a strong asset of character or not. Strong in the sense that I’m protected, and I’m saving myself some time and peace of mind. Wrong in the sense that I’m missing out, predispose myself, and judge people too fast.
Experience leads to a people-pattern
On the other hand, one might say that this attitude derives from the so far experience one has gained. Haven’t you noticed that there’s now a steady pattern of behavior, style, ideas, and attitude in the people you interact and get involved with?! Back in my early 20’s everyone would be welcome to my life- now, definitely not. I’ve matured to become picky.
Maybe this attitude is a wise and acquired in time self-defense?! I think I’ll go with that, even though I have my doubts, of course. As I see it, if you know yourself, it’s easy to recognize who you consider unnecessary and save yourself some time when dealing with them. Once again, trust your gut; we’re maturing to gain experience AND time. If your instinct has proven you more times right than wrong, then I’d say go with the odds. Experiment through time and keep only whom and what’s necessary.